When I found out I was pregnant at a time I considered myself to be in crisis, I could only imagine how it would make me a worse person. I never thought that of the ways it could push me to be a better person, and looking back now, I don’t even recognize the person I was then.
It made me less judgmental of situations I’ve never experienced or had an understanding of. Before that point, I was skeptical of how a person could get pregnant when they had the precautions not to and found myself stereotyping or generalizing people who had to make difficult decisions. Now, not only am I completely understanding of what it is like to make a difficult decision, but I try to put myself into the shoes of situations that I don’t have experience with and see the perspective of others. It isn’t always easy, but we are all just trying to do the best that we can.
It taught me to better assess both my actions and how those actions affect others. The things you do in your life affect not only you but the people around you. My life hadn’t just changed with a crisis pregnancy, but the lives of my boyfriend, adoptive family, and most importantly, the life that was created. While life can change rapidly and without warning, it is up to you as a person to make the best of situations and think of everyone it concerns.
Most importantly, it opened my heart to love I didn’t know was possible. I love my mom. I love my best friend. I love my significant other. But nothing prepared me for the love I feel for that little boy. I was surprised by the love I feel for his family for loving him as much as I do. I could not imagine life without them in the world now. Who knew a picture of a silly kid could make your heart swell and be overwhelmed with joy? It is an amazing feeling to know love like this.
A crisis pregnancy was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to face. But if I needed this test, this experience, to be the person I am today and to have my son in the world, I’ll take it and hope that I continue to learn and grow from it all.